Those people you hurt the most...

Some people say enlightenment can come from anyone, anywhere. I do believe that.
I also believe enlightenment might not always taste sweet, like we prefer it would be. In fact, most enlightenment appears in front of us when it is given or demonstrated by the people we hate the most, the people whom Gede Prama calls Guru Kehidupan, the Teacher of Life.

About a week ago, I was driving home after work when out of the ordinary the radio station that I'm used to listening to aired Gede Prama telling a story about Guru Kehidupan. Out of the ordinary too, I didn't switch the channel (when driving home from work I choose to relax by listening to the music, not by listening to a preach). In his story, Gede Prama said that we had to be grateful when we met difficult people -those who are emotionally challenging. At that time I was thinking "wow, you guys have to be grateful when you meet me!"
The reason for this gratitude is these difficult people teach us to be a better person. When you meet someone who is emotional and easily angry, then you learn to be calm. When you meet someone who is impatient, then you learn to be patient. And the story went on. Before ending his story, Gede Prama asked a question, intriguing to me. "Did you meet Guru Kehidupan today?" At that time, I couldn't help but smirking, "don't we meet them everyday?"

A week after that, I did meet one Guru Kehidupan and that Guru really taught me well.
How do I know the Guru taught me well?
Because the teaching hurts like hell.

Worst, it stings through my heart and I'm not sure it can heal.
I was shocked or I am still shocked. I grouped around to make sure I didn't stumble. Or if I did stumble, I could try to stand up. But for sometime I couldn't stand up. I couldn't even feel where my feet were.

At that moment, I knew I had to find my head. To think. And since I was not sure where it was -because it was full of black clouds and thunders- I picked up a phone call to someone I always knew had her head and conscience clear for me all the time. I called my best friend, Barb.

Between my crying and shouting, she just listened, like I expected her to do. And my question for her was 'tell me what did I do wrong?'
I didn't do anything wrong. She said.
But why this hurt like hell? I asked.
Because it came from someone close to you. She answered.

Barb calmed my shocked mental state (I never knew I could have one but there is always a first time for everything) and she taught me something I should have figured out myself.

The people that hurt you the most are always the ones who are closest to you.


So, guys, I beg you. If you decide to be Guru Kehidupan for somebody else, please please don't be one for your loved ones, your significant ones, and of course, your best friends. Why? Because once you become their Guru Kehidupan, you will hurt them and nothing you can do to take it back will make a difference.

5 comments:

    On 12:33 am, February 03, 2009 Anonymous said...

    si saya juga baru ditampar neh sama mbah nya guru malah.. jadi ikutan nyampah yah disini hehehe...

    Gue jadi mikir, kira2 gue pernah begitu gak ya ke my loved ones? (*ya pasti pernah laaaahhh.... emangnya malaikat, gak pernah salah? Aneh2 aja deh lu mikirnya, Li! Hehehe...)

    I felt the same way a few years ago, and I don't even know whether it's healed or not. All I want to believe is a fascinating life awaits me.

    Anyhow, I wish you to be strong, mbak. You are one of my guru kehidupan, but not in hurtful way.

    Harus bahasa Inggris yah !!!

    he....3x

    @Rymnz: mbahnya Guru? Wah, kayak apa tuh rasanya?

    @Ully: hehe... emang paling gampang bikin sebel org2 terdekat yak.

    @qq: thanks for your support. I also consider you as one of my sweet teacher of life.

    @Nelson: gak juga loh. Salam kenal ya!

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