Tuesday, August 08, 2006 by Mariskova
For all the years passed after my last graduation, I've never had a formal-and-official reunion. Well, actually I had one for my elementary school six years after we graduated (that was a long long long time ago), but I don't count it as a reunion. The reason is simple: my elementary classmates were mostly my next-door neighboors. If we didn't see each other often after graduation, we would see our parents or our siblings like... everyday anyway (neighbor, see?). So, what's the use of having a reunion when we would always bump into each other in front of each other's house? Anyway, we did have a reunion, just for the fun of it.
Then time passed, still I had never attended one. One reason is because there never was an official one (official= organized by a committee consisting of the graduates and the school involved). Another reason is I was not in town even when they had unofficial ones.
Do I look forward to it?
Honestly... I am not into reunion. A big-official reunion where people dress up and behave. Not then, not now, for a simple yet foolish reason: I'm not a sociable-kind of person. I am never successful in making a sociable conversation. I'm not good in answering the WHquestions or asking the right WHquestions.
Me: Hi, Lina?
Me: Oh.... silent... How are you?
Me: Coming alone?
Me: Oh... silent...
Then I would feel awkward all over among these strangers.
Well, what do you call people whom you don't see for more than 10-15 years?
Old friends? Sure! If you keep in touch. If not?
Whenever I am in a new situation meeting new people, I am usually trembling, clumsy and dumb. I don't know what to do, what to say. I need time (like a month or two) to become my full self again. So, reunion for me means something between the urge and the curiosity to meet my old friends again, and the pain of pretending. Pretending to know what to feel, what to say, and how to respond... Ugh... I wish you know what I am trying to say...
I'd rather have a small gathering once in 3-6 months where everyone can be comfortable for not behaving...